Who Cares?
When we are pregnant, or soon to
become a parent and we hear words such as care, choice, responsibility, what do
they mean?
Often, I think, the words bring up
images of those who are responsible for our care. Health workers of various
types – health care assistants, doctors, midwives – Maybe a uniform, and we are
not quite sure who is who. But they direct us in the various choices we are
said to have.
The ideas I’d like to throw into
the mix here are about caring for ourselves. Taking responsibility. Making
those choices real.
Two recent events have come to
mind. The first is something I was reading about pre-term birth which explored
the issue of maternal stress. It led me to
thinking about midwives and others who maybe have an extra weight on their
shoulders- managing stress- as well as workplace issues and how good we might
or might not be about looking after ourselves.
The second was a film preview I organised of 'Freedom for Birth' ( www.oneworldbirth.com ) recently where the subsequent discussion highlighted the fact that health
practitioners talked about offering choice, a member of parliament felt that
the democratic process and Government were playing their part by streaming
funding according to need as demonstrated by the service, and women talked
about how they felt. (Yes, a very interesting discussion!)... The less politically correct way to say it is that the consultant midwife did an excellent political job of explaining how good the local service is at offering choice, the politician did an utterly lousy job of showing any willingness to understand or to represent Joe Public (in this case mainly Jolene Public) and quite frankly made several enemies, and the women voiced clearly and articulately how they felt denied choice, coerced and bullied.
The effect of these two things on
me was to move me from the question of choice to the words ‘care’ and
‘responsibility’ – and to impress upon you, no matter your profession, status,
stage of pregnancy or parenthood... or life, that as a human being on this amazing planet,
you need to care.
Choice is about responsibility. It
means finding out how to eat well, how to balance you work and life, figuring
out what affects you emotionally and physically - or how to start to find out what might effect your decision making processes (have a look at things like Michel Odent's primal health http://www.birthworks.org/site/primal-health-research.html, or www.birthintobeing.com) how to be aware of your
changing self and family, growing baby, to question and to ask. (And if you need to, to seek out www.aims.org , the
consultant midwife or head of midwifery, an independent midwife and your MP!).
This struck me in the context of thinking about
us, as midwives, as women, who in our busy lives are grabbing unhealthy snacks
and stressing, and pregnant, accessing the system to offer us ‘choice’ and
‘care’. Surely we all know that there is a more efficacious way to look after
ourselves and our babies? A place where we stop to think.. What do I need?...What
would benefit me and my family most?...Why do I want to see my midwife today?..
What do I want to know about? ..What have I noticed, or been thinking
about? Start from the point, not of what
service is offered, but of yourself, and your body, yours and your baby’s
(babies’). Much of healthcare in pregnancy is about supporting you in what is a
normal (life-changing) stage, and should be about avoiding interference. Let’s
shift the balance of power and care for ourselves. The politics - those who are ultimately in charge of how and where the money is directed, and what pressures are on medics, insurance companies and lawyers- are only going to be affected, in the end, if we take charge of ourselves. I am not saying do not access health care, but I am saying to inform yourself and to access it on your own terms.
