Choice is for life, not just for pregnancy.

Tous les Trucs (Everything you need to know) 

This was the name of a book I bought myself in France (obviously). I was 18, and apart from thinking I was really clever for buying a book in French, it was also a great buy. (For those of you who are interested, it lists everything you might ever want to cook, how to choose it, and how to cook it to perfection (french-style)- An ideal purchase for an au pair confronted with a fridge containing a rabbit to cook for tea. I put it down to experience...) I was reminded of that book recently (I still use it occasionally - but no rabbits involved).

Being a midwife, I am used to quoting or being asked for information about all things childbirth. I can see and feel, when I talk to women and families who are expecting a baby or babies, that it is a huge relief to them, to have access to the wide range of information that they need to help them feel in control and to help them navigate their way (and to have information that they didn’t even know they needed!).


 ‘Tous les trucs’

To take it away from pregnancy a moment... Being a little older, and hopefully a little bit wiser...having experienced a little more life now, with its ups and downs, I see that there are other occasions where a person may need a ‘midwife’ of sorts... a ‘tous les trucs’ book where they can look up what it is they need to know, including all the things that they didn’t even know how to begin to ask about. There have been times of what you might call 'crisis' where I have had no idea what questions to ask! The trouble with these times is that, unlike a pregnancy, where you’ve got 9 months to ask questions and plan, even if you didn’t plan it, there is not necessarily any time! There are hundreds of books and even more online, as well as health professionals and other experts– all of whom have their own, often invaluable things to say. Where do you start?

When a person emerges from a challenging period in their life, some people said 'hey! you should write a book!'. There are LOADS of them. And everyone’s got their own story, their own agenda, their own history. What has struck me, is that all these things that I was reading have lots and lots in common about ‘choices’ and about how to live a healthier, 'better' life. It has also struck me that even when, for example someone close to us is diagnosed with something scary, life-threatening, we are shocked, we eat more greens for a while, try and de-stress a bit, before we slip back into our old habits. It has struck me mostly just how DIFFICULT it is to live what might be described as a healthy balanced life in the world we live in. (Traffic, tescos, pace of life, the power of advertising and also of drug companies, stresses, responsibilities...) We KNOW (governments know, doctors know, journalists know...) that the more modern and industrialised a country gets, the more its population suffers all sorts of dis-ease and illness. We KNOW this is to do at least in part, with how many toxins, chemicals, poisons, radiation, we eat, breathe, tolerate, rub into our skin. Yet because of the way our modern world works, we KEEP DOING IT!!! I am not going to try and tell anyone what they should be doing/eating/breathing/bathing in (well, I might try and tell a few people), but what I will say, as a midwife, as a mum, as a human on this precious earth, you do have CHOICES.  There is much in our world that we believe we don’t have a choice about, or that we believe is fine, because ‘everyone else does it’. ‘Everyone else eats that kind of food’ ‘Everyone wears that kind of make-up’,‘You HAVE to have your baby in a hospital’, ‘You HAVE to go to school’, ‘The economy MUST keep growing’ (despite the fact the earth is still the same size!). Do most breastfeeding mums sleep with their babies? Do I have to agree to have my labour induced? What are the consequences if I choose not to have antibiotics? What is the alternative to having that electronic fetal heart monitor attached to me? Question. Do the right thing. The right thing for you might not be the same as the right thing for the next person. That’s fine. You have choice.

It's our job as midwives to support you in the choices that you feel are right for you.


For those of you who have managed to read through my small explosion of words, thank you and well done - And I apologise if you were looking for something more pregnancy related today. It will come. Keep watching. It is relevant, of course. We are always banging on about choice in pregnancy and birth, and you will certainly keep hearing about it from me. But for today, I wanted to stretch the boundaries a  bit, and to twitter about how it's applicable in the rest of our existence as well. Is this what is called living mindfully? ...Maybe I'll have to stretch the boundaries of midwifery a bit more...some further reading for you in the meantime...

www.storyofstuff.com/
www.aims.org.uk/
www.theeconomicsofhappiness.org
www.canceractive.com/
www.safecosmetics.org

A new phase...

Ok, so here goes... Please be kind! - Although I started this blog a couple of years ago, obviously then was not the time. Now, I am very excited to be in a new phase of my own internet wizardry and have sent multiple pages out into the World Wide Web!

As you will see, I hope, I am starting a programme of antenatal fun, and a breastfeeding circle which I hope will give some good extra support to Mums of babies small and not-so-small. I'm really pleased to be able to hold the circle within a rural community, and I hope it will help also bring families and community together. It's also an easy space for crawlers and those who are running around, so the Mums can hopefully sit!

I'm excited about the workshops, and I hope you will be able to pass on and share this blog-link so that we can get some lovely groups of parents together to learn, grow, and develop friendships on their amazing journeys. Watch this space for the up-coming sessions in which we are hoping to incorporate a gong bath and some fantastic use of sound to help create those wonderful vibrations that will heal, nurture and invigorate you!

In the meantime, I will endeavour to stimulate you with interesting blog posts, and look forward to your comments and visits!
Thank you for being here!